Living in two-civilization houses
Most of you know my house. But I wonder how many of you knew it before Mickey and I bought it? It was hand-built by Harriet Bye and her then-husband in 1971. It had and still has some excellent vintage hippie architectural touches: a couple of hexagonal windows, a telephone pole as a support stanchion, two-by-fours laid on end to form the ceiling of the bedroom and the floor of the loft above. That little peaked arch into the kitchen —the house ended there, with a pair of sliding doors into the back yard. The original kitchen was a countertop underneath the window that has the pink and gold stained glass border. There was a sink there and a little stove. The room was dark wood-paneled, and there had been a fire in there, so much of the front wall was blackened. The yard was quite overgrown — so much so that when we took down a big rockrose we found a swing set buried in the branches. More interestingly, for some years after we moved in, whenever we would dig in the yard we would unearth stuff — toys, a ball, a spoon, one time a plaster buddha. When we bought it, the house was half the size it is now. We built on the present kitchen and bedroom, in the style of many Mendo houses — the original half charming old hippie handcraft, the add-on all square angles, formica and sheetrock walls.
Memory and Midrash
In October my close friend of over 40 years died unexpectedly. After burying her and starting to deal with her estate, I realized that along with all Sue’s property I had inherited Auntie Bea’s silver Shabbat candlesticks. Many of us have an Auntie Bea, a family matriarch who looms larger than life in our childhoods and continues to dispense largesse until they die. Mine was Aunt Vera, Sue had Auntie Bea. I remembered the candlesticks well, they looked exactly like Joan’s and Bea Matlin’s (though Bea’s were brass). Sue’s Friday night candle lighting was usually at my house, with my candlesticks, and Auntie Bea’s candlesticks eventually disappeared from her fireplace mantle. As I packed and deconstructed Sue’s household, I looked for Auntie Bea’s candlesticks, visualizing them out of retirement and lit once again at my Shabbat table. It literally wasn’t until the last day, in the very last closet on the bottom of a stack that I found the box labeled “candlesticks”, and there, finally, I found Auntie Bea’s silver candlesticks. And they were totally and completely different than how I remembered them. I mean, totally.
Yom kippur 2022 : We stand ready
Al chet sh’chatanu l’faneicha… For the sin which we have sinned before You… Someone always asks: why do we confess in the plural? We know the answer in our bones: because we are plural.
Rosh Hashana 2022:Nothing so whole as a broken heart
I stand before you tonight with a broken heart. A year ago when I chanted, “On Rosh Hashana it is written and on Yom Kippur it is sealed, who shall live and who shall die…” never in a million years did I imagine that at the next Rosh Hashana I would look out and Mickey Chalfin wouldn’t be in the front row — my sweet, beautiful, funny Mickey, who loved what and who he loved so much — whether it was Bob Dylan or a chocolate malt or Pulga or this beautiful community or al achat kamma v’chamma — as in the minor case so much more so in the major case — me. My heart is torn open. I am bereft.
Kever Avot – 5781 – Individual Observance
For centuries, perhaps millennia, Jews have visited the graves of their ancestors between Rosh Hashana and Yom Kippur. In many North American Jewish communities, there is a traditional observance of Kever Avot (Graves of the Ancestors) where the community gathers in the Jewish cemetery and visits the graves of loved ones and community members, and reads Psalms, prayers and poems. It is a time to honor those who are no longer among us and to consider life’s transience and how precious life is. It is often, also a time to schmooze and meet community members.
Matot Masei 2022:The Midbar
The Israelites set out from Rameses and encamped at Succoth.
They set out from Succoth and encamped at Etham, which is on the edge of the wilderness.
They set out from Etham and turned about toward Pi-hahiroth, which faces Baal-zephon, and they encamped before Migdol.
They set out from Pene* -hahiroth and passed through the sea into the wilderness; and they made a three-days’ journey in the wilderness of Etham and encamped at Marah.
They set out from Marah and came to Elim. There were twelve springs in Elim and seventy palm trees, so they encamped there.
They set out from Elim and encamped by the Sea of Reeds.*
They set out from the Sea of Reeds and encamped in the wilderness of Sin.
They set out from the wilderness of Sin and encamped at Dophkah.
They set out from Dophkah and encamped at Alush…
The Nazirite Vow
Many years ago I heard a story that moved me a lot. I met a young woman who had been in the Peace Corps, or something like that, in the Solomon Islands, which is a little cluster of six islands to the east of Papua New Guinea. Apparently the food supply there was limited, and so the population needed to be limited too. And so it would happen occasionally that a woman would give birth to twins, and one or another of the parents would need to commit infanticide. The grieving parent might then take on a private fast — say she would not eat papayas — as she lived through the grief of the death of this child.
The Light Continues To Shine
I was asked to do a drash for the Chanukkah party. Now usually a drash is a teaching on a Torah Portions. But Chanukkah doesn’t appear in Torah, so I don’t know if this is a drash or a teaching. Chanukkah, not only doesn’t appear in Torah, it doesn’t appear anywhere in the Hebrew Bible. It shows up in the Books of the Macabees in the Apocrypha. And it does show up in Talmud.
Juneteenth
When I started to write this drash, I knew it would be given on Juneteenth. I had no idea, however, that it would be recognized as a federal holiday as happened on Thursday. So it’s pretty exciting to be part of the cohort that is giving the first drash on the first time that Juneteenth is an official holiday in the United States.
Yom Kippur 2020 : The truth of who I am
I don’t remember your birthday. I promise I don’t. And even if I do, I won’t remember to send you a card. And if you have me over for dinner (remember when we used to have people over for dinner?) I will have a wonderful time and enjoy myself thoroughly. And I won’t send you a thank you note, probably not even an e-mail. It’s not a good thing about me. I’m not proud of this. All my life I have wished that I were more gracious in these ways, and I admire very much those people who do send little notes and bring thoughtful house gifts when they come over. Those small gestures show attentiveness and respect. They bring ease and pleasure and communicate appreciation — all things I want to do.
Rosh Hashana 2020 : So much unknowing
So how are you doing? We’ve all asked and answered this question a million times, right? And lately very often the answer we hear, and maybe the one we give, is something like, “Well I’m doing okay, except for, you know, uh, the world...”
Parshat Ekev
While I waited for Ada to be born on that long Saturday, one of the things I did to pass the time was look at the torah reading for that day. Every week a portion of the torah is read in chronological order and every Jewish community throughout the world reads the same portion each week.
The Ark of your soul
Exodus 34:1-9 The Lord said to Moses, “Carve for yourself two tablets of stone like the first ones, and I will inscribe on the tablets the words that were on the first tablets, which you shattered. 2 Be ready in the morning, and ascend in the morning to Mount Sinai and stand by me yourself there, on the top of the mountain. 3No man shall come up with you, and do not let anyone be seen throughout the entire mountain; and do not let flocks or herds graze in front of that mountain.” 4 So Moses carved out two tablets of stone like the first ones; and he rose early in the morning and went up on Mount Sinai, as the Lord had commanded him, and took in his hand the two tablets of stone.
My teaching on Toldot
First I want to summarize this week's parashah. Abraham and Sarah, who we could say were 'the first Jews, have a son Isaac, who marries Rebecca, who gives birth to twins: Esau and Jacob. Jacob becomes a scholar and a homebody who is favored by their mother; Esau is a ruddy-complexioned and hairy man, a hunter, who plies their father’s favor with tasty game.
Parshat Toldot
Our Aliyah today is Toldot, Chapter 26, verses 6-12. It is a very short self -contained vignette inserted into the midst of the family drama of Isaac, Rebecca, Jacob and Esau that makes up most of the Parsha. We read that Isaac and Rebecca journey to the land of the Philistines in a time of famine. Isaac passes Rebecca off as his sister. Avimelech, king of the Philistines, observes Isaac fondling Rebecca and suspects the truth. When he confronts him, Isaac admits the lie, and Avimelech says, “What is this thou hast done to us? One of the people might easily have lain with your wife and thou wouldst have brought guiltiness upon us.”
Kedoshem - "Love the Stranger"
A Picto-D’rash of Parsha Yitro
1. Core significance of this Parsha
2. The Scene of Sinai
3. The People
4. The Boundary
5. Moses: Who said what to whom?, “Darsheini”
6. The Torah is Given
7. Torah Kedumah / Primordial Torah
8. Oral Torah/ Written Torah
9. God / Clouds of Glory / Shekhinah
10. Hands of God
13. Unification/ Our Portion
Parshat Hukas
1. Num. 19:1-22: The Red Heifer and the preparation of what is often translated as the “water of sprinkling” or “the water of lustration”. The Hebrew actually reads as the “water of nidah/separation (Num 19:13). Commentators call this a classic example of a HUKKAH, a commandment for which there is no rational explanation, observed because it is divinely commanded. It may have reference to other, older pre-Mosaic rituals and cult practices.
Why did the snake do what he did?
Shabbat shalom. In my parshah, parshat bereshit, there are many major things that happen. God creates the world; he creates life, plants, animals, and lastly humans. Also there is the matter of Adam and Eve getting sent out of Eden. Here is the story, in case you don’t know it; god made Adam and Eve on the sixth day placing them in the Garden of Eden, and then on the seventh day he rested. He told Adam and Eve that “from all the trees in the garden you may eat, but from the tree of knowledge of good and evil you may not, because it will surely bring you death.” Then came the snake, he said “even if God said do not eat from the tree...” this statement suggests that it is okay to eat from the tree, he proceeds to then trick Eve to eat the fruit and give some to Adam. God saw this and banned them from Eden. He also gave the snake a punishment for tricking them.
Why did the snake do what he did?
Shabbat shalom. In my parshah, parshat bereshit, there are many major things that happen. God creates the world; he creates life, plants, animals, and lastly humans. Also there is the matter of Adam and Eve getting sent out of Eden. Here is the story, in case you don’t know it; god made Adam and Eve on the sixth day placing them in the Garden of Eden, and then on the seventh day he rested. He told Adam and Eve that “from all the trees in the garden you may eat, but from the tree of knowledge of good and evil you may not, because it will surely bring you death.” Then came the snake, he said “even if God said do not eat from the tree...” this statement suggests that it is okay to eat from the tree, he proceeds to then trick Eve to eat the fruit and give some to Adam. God saw this and banned them from Eden. He also gave the snake a punishment for tricking them.