Mendocino E-Megillah Mendocino Coast Jewish Community   December 2009 (5770) The Jewish Center (Shul) is located at 15071 Caspar Road, Caspar CA. The MCJC can be reached at (707) 964-6146 Mail can be sent to PO Box 291, Little River, CA 95456 website: http://www.mcjc.org email: mcjcmegillah@mcjc.org PDF Version: http://www.mcjc.org/mjoldart/Megillah/MJMM0000.htm Facebook: MCJC - Mendocino Coast Jewish Community   MCJC Kids

Oy, I’m hooked on mussar!   It hasn’t even been a week since our first class (which I’m nominally teaching but also trying to participate in as the novice I am,) and it’s already changing how I look at life – my own, anyhow.  

Mussar is about cultivating positive middot – measures, character traits, soul characteristics, plain old behaviors.  It’s about being the right amount of patient, steady, honest, kind and so on.  But, lest it sound like the Girl Scouts, it’s about turning a telescope within to look at the mechanics of how we actually live.  What do I actually do all day?  How do I decide whether to do this or that?  What effects to my actions have on everyone around me?

I remember, when I was about eight, my friend and classmate, Mike Lingle – a guy who was just so smart that the fun of thinking rolled out of him all the time – started making flow charts of a day of life.  Alarm clock rings.  You can: get out of bed / roll over and go back to sleep.  Say you decide to get up.  You can: find your clothes and put them on / go into the kitchen and make yourself some chocolate milk / pick a fight with your sister.  Say you opt for the chocolate milk.  You can…

Who knew that Mike was teaching mussar at age eight?  Each of these nodes on his flow chart is a bekhirah point, a place where a decision is made.  Get dressed or pick a fight?  What if you are working on the middah of zerizut – zeal, passion, showing up – and your sister is trying to talk you into skipping school?  Maybe it is actually better in this moment to fight, to stand up in the face of temptation, than to be your usual acquiescent and apathetic self.  Maimonides counsels the middle path; you can have too much humility, too much self-effacement, for example.

The classical mussar teachings go back to the Bible and Talmud, certainly to the Golden Age of Maimonides, Rabbeinu Bachya, the RaMCHaL and others.  But the technology – how you actually implement the teachings – is a more modern enterprise.  The mussar movement began in the mid-nineteenth century in Vilna, flowered for a generation or two, then went dormant with much of European Judaism.  It is being revived these days by several contemporary teachers and their students and has even made its way to the North Coast of California.  I’ve been passively interested in mussar for some time.  But it was the inspiration of Caroline Isaacs up in Eureka which motivated a number of us to get serious about learning and trying these practices.

In my beginning efforts, it seems to me that the heart of the work is looking closely and realistically at how I actually operate.  It is in a sense looking at the flow chart of each day and noting which paths I have chosen.  Then it is a matter of thinking about the moral and spiritual content of these little daily choices.  The mussar-dik way to look at them, at least according to some teachers, is not in terms of whether they make me happy or not, but how they affect others.  Do they, in the words of Rabbi Simcha Zissel of Kelm, “bear the burden of the other?”  

So, let’s see, yesterday morning…  It’s cold outside.  I have plans in the afternoon (to see the incomparable Ronnie Gilbert – fantastic!)  The Sunday Times has not yet appeared in our box, despite my sweet Mickey biking out there three times to retrieve it for me.   I’m bundled up in my big red chair, drinking tea.  And I find myself thinking about choices before me.  I could finish last week’s New Yorker.  I could get up and get moving, maybe clean things up a bit around here.  I could make us breakfast.   I could make some phone calls I need to make.  Meanwhile I keep bouncing up and checking my e-mail, as though some message is going to come and put me on my path.

Bechirah points.  I can see myself sliding reflexively towards the New Yorker option, as I kind of knew I would.  It’s like rolling over and going back to sleep.  But some new little part of me asks, ‘who does it serve?’  I get a glimpse of the avoidant part of me duking it out with the part that cherishes those quiet morning minutes.  (I decide that a half-hour of reading and tea-drinking will be plenty, to be followed by some more virtuous enterprises.  I more or less keep my bargain with myself.  I think that in the tiniest possible way it actually does allow me to do a bit of good with my morning.)

All of this may sound obsessively minute, and I suppose it is.  But somehow in it all I feel a little sigh of relief.  Because I, like all of us, actually struggle all the time with these tiny little bechirah points – but usually below the level of conscious choice.  And there is something exhausting and depleting about feeling like life is slipping by – another hour, another day, and I really didn’t live it as fully as I would wish.  Now, mussar tyro that I am, I am trying to see myself in action (and in inaction!)  It’s like I am allowing myself to see the creaky joints of how I move through daily life.  And knowledge is power.  

The next step is to try to move in the direction of positive middot.  But I don’t know how to do that part yet…  

Someone in our class posed the fundamental question: why try to be better?  And, even while I tried to conjure up how the RaMCHaL or Maimonides or Rabbi Salanter would respond, my wise fellow students began offering up their own answers: to let your soul shine more brightly, to connect with God, to move in the direction of love.

It seems clear to me, if not always easy to articulate, that life is precious and brief, and there are choices in every moment that bring more radiance and connection and love into life, or the opposite.  At some level there are much more important issues in life than whether I read a magazine or put the toast in the toaster.  But at some level, all of life is individual moments in which we do one thing or another or another.

-- In the middle of writing this I got a call from a friend and had one of those long chats about the big picture, life choices, calling, passionate commitments and so on.  And now I return to Mike Lingle’s flow charts of daily life.  What was missing from his drawings were those occasional bigger, more impactful moments in which we make decisions that significantly affect our lives (poor guy, he was only eight…)   At these bigger choice points we commit ourselves to particular people, beliefs and practices, and these may at times call for larger and more dramatic actions than are usually the material for mussar reflection.

But even these are lived out moment-to-moment, in the details of how one spends a chilly Sunday morning.  And even these call for looking at the bones of those decisions, which middot are in play, whether they are balanced, how they affect and serve and bear the burdens of others.

This morning, thinking a bit more about how I’ve been tending to let time slip by, I decided to make a little schedule for the next couple of hours.  Just an experiment in the middah of seder, orderliness, keeping on-track.  Time for Megillah-writing is just about up.  And I think I’m just about at the end here.  

    - Rabbi Margaret Holub © 2009

In December the Mussar class will meet on Wednesdays, Dec. 2 and 16, 5:00 – 7:00 PM at the shul. At each class we will study and discuss another middah (personality trait) from the list proposed by Rabbi Mendel of Satanov. On December 2 we will study savlanut (patience.) On December 16 we will study seder (order.) January dates are January 6 (haritzut – decisiveness) and January 20 (nekiyut – cleanliness.) This is an ongoing class, meeting every other week through the year. But you are welcome to come in for individual sessions if you would like to. (mh)

Sharing Joys and Sorrows with our Community
We want to be more systematic about letting each other know when someone in our community has a death in their family, or a child or grandchild born, or other life-changing news.  If you would like for an announcement to go out to the MCJC community by e-mail and/or in the Megillah of such an event in your life, please let Margaret know at 937-5673 or

When People Are in Need of Help

Joan and Norman Rudman;  Sally and Lee Welty;  Jennifer Kreger and Wade Gray;  Susan Hofberg;  Rena Blauner;  Gerry and Sara Kreger;  Donna Feiner;  Bonnie Novakov Lawlor; Rosalie and Art Holub; Roberta and David Belson; Irv and Rosalie Winesuff; Ruth and S.A. Rosenblum Ephraim; Ari and Carol Schnieder; Betty Deutsch; Mina Cohen and Jeff Berenson; Nancy Harris

Sandy Glickfeld In Honor of the High Holyday Torah readers; Dan Mandelbaum and Benna Kolinsky In Honor of our beloved Congregation; Nancy and Richard Banker In Honor of Lillian Stein Kohl Sirmeny; Dawn and Bob Hofberg Schlosser In Memory of Lilian Sommer's yahrzeit; Bernice and Harold Zoller In Honor of Helen Jacobs' 60th birthday. (mz)

Mendocino Maven
by The Shadow
Chanukah (

on Thursday December 10th as part of its Personal Enrichment Lecture Series. The film will be shown in room 114 with refreshments at 5:30 and the film at 6:00 pm. The film is one hour in length and Judith Meisel’s daughter Mina Cohen will be on hand to answer questions after the film. We have shown this film at the shul but if you missed it, it has been shown on PBS and has won awards at international film festivals. The film follows Judith back to her shtetl in Lithuania and explores her pre-war childhood to her escape and liberation in Denmark. The focus is on her work as an activist and educator, and her efforts to affect social change. There is no admission charged for this program. (mc)

Book Group
The book group will meet Monday December 21st at the home of Rosamond Gumpert Jorgensen Please call Fran Schwartz at 937-1352 if you wish to join us. We will be reading

by David Benioff. This novel reads like a true story takes place during the siege of Leningrad when the city is on the verge of starvation. It is the adventure of two unlikely comrades who are sent in search of a dozen eggs for a wedding cake. Books are available at Cheshire Books in Fort Bragg for a 10% discount if you let them know you are in the Jewish Book Group. We welcome new people at any time. (mc)

Thank You for Megillah Help
Thank you to Mettika Hoffman for collating and mailing our last megillah. Contact Mina if you’d like to help with this task. (mc)

The Freezer Has Tasty and Hearty Food for You
In this season of illness, MCJC can help you with locally made vegetarian food stocked in a freezer at the shul. If you have any need for sustenance in an emergency, all you have to do is call one of the members of the Bikkur Cholim committee and we’ll let you know how to get it, or send someone for it. The committee is Fran Schwartz at 937-1352, Karen Rakofsky at 937-5522, or Mina Cohen at 937-1319. All food is vegetarian, not spicy, and we have ingredients available if you have any allergies. (mc)

Torah School Evolution
Torah school has moved back to the shul and will meet at 3:30 after school every other Friday. This will coincide with the monthly Tisch for one of those weeks each month. The children have expressed a desire to learn some Hebrew this year and we have all kinds of projects, field trips, and even a sleep over planned. If you have a child eligible for Torah School and did not get a letter please contact Jessica at 937-2115. Torah School is appropriate for all elementary school aged children. (mc)

December Tisch
There will be no tisch in December, we’ll meet again Friday, January 8th. (mc)

Chanukah Party
The MCJC annual Chanukah Party will be at the shul on Sunday, December 13th at 5:30.  Latkes will be provided by our great volunteers (to help cook phone Donna Montag @ 877-3243).  This is not a potluck, food will be served, but we are requesting ONLY salads, appleasuce or cookies for easy of serving the many that we expect.  If you can provide any of these, OR are able to help set up, serve or clean up, call Luna @ 972-4494.  Bring your menorahs and candles, and come early.  See you there! (dm)

Beginners Bird Walk
Led by Holly Tannen, Wednesday December 9th 8:45 - 10:45 am, Big River Haul Road

How do birders recognize all them different birds? What birds can we spot at the bend of Big River? What is fascinating about each of them? Are they really dinosaurs in disguise? Bring: Drinking water, a snack to share, binoculars and birding guides if you have them. Experienced birders also welcome.

Directions: just north of the bridge south of Mendocino town, take the drive down to Big River Beach. Turn left past the standing stones, go uphill and a bit left and park across from the (now locked) toilets. We'll look out for you. In case of rain, we'll postpone till Wednesday December 16th. Questions? Call Holly at 937-5085.

Megillah Format
The Mendocino Megillah is generated in two formats: the legacy hardcopy format which is optimized for printing on 8 1/2 x 11 inch paper and the HTML format which is formatted for easy reading on a computer display. You can subscribe to the hardcopy version and have it mailed to you, you can subscribe to the email version or you can receive both. If you don’t need the hardcopy and want to do your bit to repair the world by going electronic, and saving paper, toner and physical transport, please email  Myra at myrah@mcn.org  Todah Rabah! (rge)

Albion Doors and Windows:  1000s of recycled windows, French doors, thermal windows, entry doors, new & used * Leaded glass, arches & unique styles * Liquidation prices at 937-0078 in Albion * www.knobsession.com

Cheshire Books: Eclectic community bookstore located in the heart of downtown Fort Bragg at 363 N. Franklin St. * Open Mon.- Fri. 10:30 am-5:30 pm, Sat. 10:00 am-5:00 pm, & Sun. 11:00 am-3:00 pm * 964-5918

College Bound Advising * College search, coaching, and application assistance * Mina Cohen, certified college counselor * Individual consultation and group workshops * Tel: 937-1319 * cbadvising.com

Frankie's Pizza and Ice Cream Parlor: Homemade pizzas, Cowlick's ice cream and other yummy things to nosh on.  Beer and wine available. Live music weekly, all ages welcome.  Open daily from 11 - 9 at 44951 Ukiah Street, Mendocino, 937-2436. www.frankiesmendocino.com

Fashen Faber: Marriage and Family Therapist * Offering psychotherapy with EMDR, Guided Imagery, Insight Therapy * Deep healing for trauma, depression, anxiety, panic attacks, relationship problems * Gay & lesbian & transgender issues * Individuals, couples, teens, families * Mendocino * 937-2791

Hortus Botanicus Nursery and Gardens (since 1994): Annuals, perennials, unusual trees, shrubs, clematis, nepenthes and other carnivorous plants, orchids and succulents at 20103 Hanson Rd, Ft. Bragg. Closed Tuesdays and Wednesdays. Fall and Winter hours are Thursday - Monday 10 to 4, Sundays 11 to 3.  Robert Goleman, Owner. www.hortusb.com or 964-4786

ICONS:  Global Gifts- Local Art:  Coastal photography; wood carvings; ceramics; Judaica (siddurim, seder plates, etc.) ; Buddha; saint: and goddess statues; classic rock tee-shirts and memorabilia; new CDs and DVDs and used LPs; cards, books, and much more!  Open daily, 10466 Lansing St., Mendocino  937-1784

Montag’s Handyman Service: Carpentry, Plumbing, Electrical, Furniture Repairs, Antique Restoration * George Montag * 33410 Greenwood Rd., Elk, CA.  95432 * montag@mcn.org * 707-877-3243

Out of this World: telescopes, binoculars, & science toys at 45100 Main St., * Box 1010, Mendocino * 937-3335 * www.DiscountTelescopes.com

Phoebe Graubard: Attorney at Law * Wills, trusts, probate, conservatorships * 594 S. Franklin, Fort Bragg, 95437 * 964-3525 * www.mcn.org/a/celr * Member National Academy of Elder Law Attorneys * Wheelchair accessible

Rainsong & Rainsong Shoes: Rainsong & Rainsong Shoes: From head to toe in Mendocino! * Contemporary clothing * Shoes & accessories for men & women * 3 locations: Mendocino, Healdsburg, and our new store in Montgomery Village, Santa Rosa * 937-4165 (clothing) * 937-1710 (shoes) * 433-8058 (Healdsburg) * 576-8919 (Santa Rosa) http://www.rainsongshoes.com

Raven Deerwater, EA, PhD: Tax practitioner * Specializing in families, home-based & small businesses, & non-profit organizations * 45121 Ukiah St. * Box 1786, Mendo * 937-1099 * raven@taxpractitioner.com www taxpractitioner.com

Richard Green & Co. Certified Public Accountant * 45170 Main Street, Mendocino * 937-5260 * rgcpa@adelphia.net

Richochet Ridge Ranch: Trail rides on beach, across from MacKerricher State Park * Reservations: 964-PONY(7669) * 1-1/2 hr. to all day rides, exceptional horses, English and Western * Week long No. Calif. & International riding vacations * Free brochure contact Lari Shea, 24201 N. Highway 1, Fort Bragg, 95437 *
 http://www.horse-vacation.com/

Rosenthal Construction: 703 N. Main St., Fort Bragg * 964-1200

Silver and Stone: 45005 Ukiah St., Mendocino * 937-0257 * Contemporary sterling silver & gemstone jewelry for women & men * Affordable to indulgent *11 am to 6 pm daily

Thanksgiving Coffee Co.: local roasters on the Mendocino Coast over 3 decades * Certified organic, shade grown coffee & Fair Trade Coffees * Box 1918, Fort Bragg, 95437 * (800)462-1999
* www.thanksgivingcoffee.com

Kabbalat Shabbat
 6:00p Cohen/
Berenson)

* = board member